murky udders.

In February 2019 I felt a lumpy area in my breast. I was 48-years old. I saw a nurse practitioner and asked for an order for a diagnostic mammogram. Results reported: NORMAL. I was scared. My mother died of breast cancer at age 57. I went back to the same primary care office to see a woman physician, board certified in family medicine. She put on her purple vinyl gloves and did a speed-of-light clinical breast exam. She then stated: “I don’t feel anything.” Dismissed, I was still scared.

I decided I would walk into the same breast imaging center that did the mammogram since I saw on their website that they had physicians — who are breast surgeons. I visited them three times before the end of July. Each time they touched my breast. They told me my breasts were supposed to feel this lumpy because they were extremely dense. The said I should try vitamin E and primrose oil. I told them my husband felt the lumps.

In December of 2019, I could see the lump in my breast when I raised my arm. I had a 4-centimeter area of cancer touching my skin and the covering of my chest muscle. My breast was removed, plastic surgery done, 24 radiation treatments and I took tamoxifen. Tamoxifen probably caused me to lose some of my hair, increased my liver enzymes and the thickness of my uterus. In December 2019, I had a total hysterectomy and my ovaries removed.

Here is what I learned: BREAST CANCER IS A BIG BUSINESS. What I was not offered, on occasions, even after my diagnosis is what leaves me outraged. At times there were amazing caregivers involved. Other times, my health was betrayed due to reimbursement incentives, return on investment or legal risk.

Unfortunately and fortunately, I knew. You see, I have worked as a nurse and pharmacist. I am trained in health policy and management and finance. In 2018, I worked and fought maybe up to 80-hours just to get my out-of-network insurance claims properly processed. I chose my breast surgeon from 4 — all offering differing plans of care. I chose my radiation oncologist after interviewing five because the first radiation plan of care was for a woman with a breast.

My mammograms had a less than 50% likelihood of seeing my cancer. Those clinical breast exams, have an 80% failure rate at cancer diagnosis. No one can diagnose cancer by touch.